Saturday, April 4, 2015

Civ Pro Battle

On the drive to school in the mornings I have time to write rhymes, raps, poems, riddles, etc. in my head. I've been working on one that mashes together some civil procedure (law) jargon and I need to type it out to get it to go away so I can enjoy my homework + Netflix weekend in peace. Oh and also Easter. So here it is:

Civ Pro Battle
By: Randy Morris

Bro you can't hang with me
Why don't you take a hike?
Before the court grants
My motion to strike.
When it comes to the rules
I don't think you understand
That I can throw you out of court
Like I'm Judge Learned Hand.
And I don't got time
To wait around for the remix
I'll just kill it now
With a 12(b)(6).
If we reach discovery
I'm gonna give you hell
If I don't get what I want
I'll send a motion to compel.
And yes I read your brief
I think your case is repugnant
It won't survive my motion
For summary judgment.
You're gonna bring an appeal?
Bro I thought you woulda learned
That I'll have kicked your ass twice
When my judgment's affirmed.
I'm just in this for the money
I only do it for the wealth
So I won't submit the motion
But you should sanction yourself.
The beating that I dished out
Was a little too criminal
So I better stop here
Rule 1 says I should keep it civil.

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